Trust and Vulnerability in Leadership

I bought my husband a subscription to Master Class for Christmas, and I have found myself watching and listening to the subscription more than he does. This week I have been invested in the lessons Coach K (the long-time Duke basketball coach) has on leadership. Throughout Coach K’s learning series, he breaks down traits of being a leader and applies them to the game of basketball and then extends these traits to the business world.

Today’s early morning fifteen-minute lesson was on how leaders must be trusted to lead effectively and how vulnerability can contribute to building trust. I think there are some parts of imposter syndrome when a new role begins that can be shared openly as the adjustment happens, but I think there is a delicate balance between this vulnerability and how one does this, so they do not self-sabotage and cause others to lose trust in them. It’s finding this balance that becomes the art of leadership. Many new processes within our school are being put into place as “the plane is flying” if I, as a leader, question my ability to implement all the changes, then trust in my leadership will go to the wayside. If, however, I have a confidence level with some processes, I need to lead with these, and then share that there are some questions I have about other operations and vocally share these questions. I think this is trust and vulnerability applied to the actual leadership work, but I also think trust and vulnerability need to be shared about things other than the work.

As a leader, I believe, certain parts of being human and being yourself also need to be shared to build trust and empathy in a team. I think it can be beneficial to share little nuggets from one’s personal life so that others can see the leader as multi-dimensional. When a leader is seen as multi-dimensional, I think this helps others relate, and may, in turn, help future leaders believe they can aspire and work towards a leadership role. I do not think vulnerability should hinder one’s job performance, and vulnerability should be used as a crutch to play “a victim’s game.”  In other words, I don’t think someone’s imposter syndrome should cause inaction or skepticism in performance.

I, as a leader, must work through my imposter syndrome and perform despite it. For example, I worry about my ability to connect and build personal relationships with others; this is a vulnerability I have had my entire life—starting off in my early childhood years as selectively mute and known as “the girls who doesn’t talk” by my classmates (who called me this outwardly throughout my pre-K-grade 2 experience) and then through struggles with social anxiety. If I were playing a “victim’s game” with this trait, I would state this and then just push paper, make decisions in isolation, and essentially become a dictatorship. I do not think I lead this way, but I can acknowledge that this would be the easiest way for me to lead. Instead, I need to lead “the hard way” (for me), which is through consistently extending myself and building personal relationships. I work through this by building these relationships through one-on-one interactions centered on the work.

I am not a leader who will mesmerize an entire crowd of people, but I can get the work done through small everyday one-on-one or small group interactions. These one-on-one interactions force me to be vulnerable as I work through my imposter syndrome related to personal relationship building, and in turn, build trust with my team. Consistency in approaching leadership this way over time, builds trust as both my professional and personal vulnerabilities are shared in these interactions. It builds trust in my own abilities as I work through the imposter syndrome, and builds trust in my team as they get to know me on both a personal and professional level.